Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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