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• (305): View more from Florida

  Goddamnit I hate your level headedness

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.

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• (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Get out now.

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• (415): View more from California

  Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (310): View more from California

  You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.

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• (516): View more from New York

  You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.

  (989): View more from Michigan

  this is the most serious roommate agreement ever

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• (607): View more from New York

  she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.

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