I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.