No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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