Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
