i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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