South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
