Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
