Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
