Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
