Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize