Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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