Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad

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  (206): Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad http://tfl.nu/uv9f
  Replies (21) Good night (1540) Bad night (826)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv

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  (615): a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv http://tfl.nu/wh93
  Replies (15) Good night (1249) Bad night (4105)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.

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  (617): i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night. http://tfl.nu/15vj
  Replies (50) Good night (5069) Bad night (1690)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.

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  (703): This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar. http://tfl.nu/4fqp
  Replies (9) Good night (2523) Bad night (933)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...

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  (816): As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall... http://tfl.nu/n3n5
  Replies (2) Good night (1375) Bad night (799)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis

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  (609): I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis http://tfl.nu/47d5
  Replies (5) Good night (2584) Bad night (951)
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  (315): View more from New York

  What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Its 11 o'clock somewhere

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  (315): What's the rule on cocaine before dinner? (414): Its 11 o'clock somewhere http://tfl.nu/yof7
  Replies (7) Good night (2648) Bad night (1019)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?

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  (812): Is it too early to say this year has been a blur? http://tfl.nu/q8ht
  Replies (2) Good night (1144) Bad night (1165)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband

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  (512): ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband http://tfl.nu/p8hd
  Replies (5) Good night (589) Bad night (1904)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.

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  (805): Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012. http://tfl.nu/u0sr
  Replies (3) Good night (1291) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity

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  (832): I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle. (214): I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity http://tfl.nu/3j7l
  Replies (2) Good night (722) Bad night (352)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.

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  (612): It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected. http://tfl.nu/ebyi
  Replies (4) Good night (924) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.

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  (570): He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile. http://tfl.nu/txef
  Replies (11) Good night (609) Bad night (351)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?

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  (208): Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess? http://tfl.nu/auqt
  Replies (6) Good night (841) Bad night (244)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.

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  (585): He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down. http://tfl.nu/e3ty
  Replies (3) Good night (107) Bad night (539)

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