I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
