Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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