it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
