i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
there is glitter all over my balls
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
