some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
