You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
