He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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