he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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