Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I am naked and annoyed.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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