Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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