Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
how does that bad decision feel?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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