he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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