you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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