I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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