somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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