no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
