whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Nicole vs. Life
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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