I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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