I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
