i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
