Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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