i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
and you fell through a lawn chair
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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