she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
