I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Houston, we have a blender
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
