Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize
