Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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