She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize