just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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