Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
My dick has a subreddit
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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