so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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