I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
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