Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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