and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
