Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Randomize
