A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
