We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
