Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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