His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize