Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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