i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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