Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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